For the past couple of months I’ve been concentrating on working on products I can sell.  I guess you could say I’ve been trying my hand at marketing myself.  The marketing part is all rather new to me - in the sense that I’m marketing “ME” and not some product.  So I suppose I’m a bit more cautious when it comes to how I do it.  Sometimes I’m sitting here wondering if I’m doing it right at all.

I guess we all have those moments.  Moments where we’re on the top of the world because we’ve sold a few items, beat a goal, sold more than expected, been to the moon and back sort of thing.  Then there are those other moments - moments that I seem to have a lot of and I’m trying my best to shove into a closet somewhere and get them away from me.  It’s those moments of self-doubt.  I know, I know.  I should be positive.  I think the products I’m working on are worthwhile and people will like them.  But that creepy self-doubt makes an appearance and it takes  a few days… weeks to get over and me to get back into the swing of things.

I HATE that when that happens.

I’m not sure what you do when you have those moments - or even if you have them?

I guess I’m having one of those moments… again.  It’s not even that it’s all that big a deal, but I wish I had the answers to get the results I want.  The other day I was to renew some advertising I had up.  The site where I had the advertising had bumped it’s pricing due to demand.  I don’t doubt for a second that was the case.  But the pricing had gone up  $25 dollars a month - and well, I am not making enough to cover it.  It doesn’t seem like a lot but I’m trying to advertise on a few sites and I have a budget for how much I’m going to spend each month so I don’t slide into the red.

This bummed me out because I was getting good traffic and leads from it.  So my ad went the way of the dodo on that site BUT there is a silver lining to my cloud of advertising doom - I now have $$ to spend on someone else’s site - or even get a couple sites in there for the price I was paying.  Maybe it’s a good thing, but I was a bit bummed.

Then last night I applied for some work - but was turned down because I was “competition”… and this might lead to mis-givings, etc, etc.  I guess that was a “my bad” moment - but it bummed me out because that was an awesome opportunity to start working with people who shared my passion.  Strangely enough, the turn down turned out to be a bit of a downer for about half an hour.

Yes, I turned that frown upside down I guess.  I think of it like this:

• This person took a look at what I was doing and saw me as competition.  That means I must be doing something right.
• I am getting enough interest on my own for the moment to go “meh” to the whole process of the job.
• I am now more determined than ever to keep doing what I’m doing and prove to myself that I can do this.

It was just the opportunity to work with people that shared my interest, where I could learn new tricks to the trade, and just enjoy what I am doing with out the frustration of trying to find the people to buy on my own.  That would have been someone else’s deal.   But alas, I got the “thanks anyway” spiel and now I’m not back at square one - but I’m now trying to be “more resilient” and do this myself.

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